An ancient Greek myth states that eons ago, man and woman were one creature. This creature was magnificent and brought together an ecstatic confluence of two brilliant species. Naturally, this ignited envy amongst the other species, who ended up looking subservient to the majesty of this creature. In retaliation they plotted. They went to the God of Thunder and asked for this creature to be split into two, their request was obliged, and thus man and woman were created.
Hence came to light the concept of ‘the better half’ , popularized by pop culture, bad Bollywood movies, matrimonial ads and every romantic comedy in the 21st century. The ultimate tale of finding ‘someone that completes you’ began and the sojourn continues.
I was on this sad sojourn too, and no, I was not looking for the perfect ‘man’ (I am not delusional, such a thing does not exist), I was looking for the perfect ‘employee’. Think about it, you do spend more of your day with your co-workers than your spouse, so why shouldn’t you look for the perfect ‘match’?
Thus began my tryst with fate as I embarked upon a journey to find ‘The Perfect One’, and the more time I spent doing it, the more I realized how hiring is most definitely like marriage!
Stage 1- ‘Love at First Swipe’
In the age of Tinder and Truly Madly, love at first sight has been swapped with ‘love at first swipe’. Similarly, the first step of finding ‘The Perfect one ’ (TPO) is that swipe, that first look on Linkedin, the cautious flirting on Naukri.com. That one glance at the resume makes you feel like ‘Yes! This is who I was looking for my whole life!’
Stage 2- The Chase
Playing hard to get has been a national pastime for Indian women since the era of Cavemen. Picture this Caveman sees Cavebabe at the Caveparty, eyes meet, introductions happen , he woos her with hunting , she keeps the chase up. Caveman is in ‘hubba hubba’ mode, Cavebabe is coy. Romance is in the air. Not much has changed. Similarly TPO knows you liked what you saw; the first phone call always ends with a coy shy ‘I am very happy here, haven’t thought about the change’. AKA ‘Bitch you better woo me’.